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Tuesday, June 16, 2009


For the last 5 months, I have either walked with great aid from a walker, or rolled around on a scooter.  Although my scooter is great for holding my purse, supporting Annika as she learns to use a ripstik, and attracting a lot of curious onlookers, it is an apparatus I would love to permanently park in my garage someday.

Sometimes I watch people walking and can hardly put it together in my brain how their body is able to balance, move, and have forward motion--all at the same time.  It has seemed hardly possible to imagine how my body could ever figure out how to walk again . . . UNTIL TODAY!

OK--I will fill you in on the details.  Here's the deal . . .

The good Lord knows that I adore my dear Dr. Carbonell.  But sometimes I feel like he has tunnel vision on my wound right now and doesn't let me in on what he is thinking about my entire case. So today, as he was running from patient to patient at Wound Care, I blocked the door of my exam room and asked if he could give a little "State of the Nation/Ankle" address to an audience of one (me).  

He basically told me that we have three things to work on with my ankle.  First, we need to get the wound to close (it is getting smaller, but still not sealed up).  Then, I need to get back to physical therapy to gain strength and motion in my ankle.  When that is done, I will learn to walk independently without a boot or a brace.  (All that being said--we also need to keep praying the the bone doesn't die.)

He said that--right now--my ankle joint is like a tire without any tread.  If it is constantly flexing without the help of strong muscles and tendons around it, the talus bone runs the risk of collapsing.  So . . . he told me that he would like for me to WALK USING THE BOOT so that my ankle is kept in a fixed position while getting my leg muscles back in shape. 

I thought, "Well, yea.  You can give me three balls and tell me to juggle but I may just end up throwing the balls in the air and watching them fall to the ground.  Cause, you know--I am real good at falling."  Walk?!?!?  

So--I went home, hauled out the boot, put a big shoe on my good foot, and took a step forward.  IT WAS A MIRACLE!  I walked all the way across the house like I actually knew what I was doing!  Too weird.  Now--mind you--it ain't pretty.  I won't be winning any gracefulness contests on America's Top Model but I am getting from Point A to Point B on my own power.  

In addition to giving some clear directives, Dr. Carbonell also opened up his bag of "wound-closing" tricks to try to get my ankle healed up by Christmas (my new realistic goal).  He has tried human newborn foreskin (didn't work), horse heart (didn't work), and a medieval torture device (kinda worked)--so we are now trying . . . PIG INTESTINE!  Yep, I now have some "Oasis Matrix" in my wound to try to create a "bridge" to connect my own skin tissue together over the hole in my ankle.  


Later, my sweet nurses put a flexible "cast" on my entire leg to keep it stiff.  They were especially kind today, telling me that I have been a real "trooper," and that I need to keep hanging in there.  Their kindness was a blessing.

I read a little thing recently that said that you should always be kind to others because you don't know what battle they may be going through today.  It is so true.  My battle is very visible and obvious.  However, so many of my friends are having quiet struggles with bad marriages, difficult children, shrinking bank accounts, low self-esteem . . . and the list goes on and on.   

Thank you for the kindness that you have shown to my family and me throughout this entire journey.  I will work to "pay it forward!"

Love to you all!

Anne